“Online dating is good. I’m very, very glad it exists. It gives opportunities to singles who otherwise wouldn’t have them,” says Eli J. Finkel, an associate professor of social psychology at Northwestern University and the study’s lead author (McCarthy). Online dating has worked for many and opened many doors for some people, however, I personally believe there are too many negative aspects to it. There is too much risk to meet someone who is lying about their looks, age, interests, and personality. Online dating is far from real world dating, you can never truly know what the person you are talking too is like when they are hiding behind a screen. Meeting someone in person is the only way to find out if they are really a match for you. While online dating has become more common and more of a social “norm,” there are still many flaws to this method of dating. In this situation, the flaws outweigh the pros.
While online dating may seem easier, there negative aspects of using this dating method because of the anonymity and ability to lie about one’s self. For example, people may lie about their age making themselves younger to increase their dating pool. Rutgers communications assistant professor Jennifer Gibbs stated that someone might say they’re 35 instead of 36 to not get filtered out of demographics searches on dating sites (Conger). Other common lies include one’s height, weight, income and marital status. Lying about such things will only lead to a lot of disappointment. People can use old pictures to make themselves appear more attractive, or even alter themselves in pictures to change their appearance. Another disadvantage of online dating is that it is hard to tell if there is any actual chemistry and compatibility. In person you have the ability to tell if you are compatible right away, making weeding out potential dates easier. Finally, people are able to hide certain flaws, it can also cultivate intimate communication at a faster pace than in-person interactions. Researchers have named this tendency as the “hyper personal effect.” The hyper personal effect can very easily ruin your first in-person date if you’ve built up an idealized/fantasy version of your potential partner in your mind (Conger). Online dating can be very difficult disappointing, untruthful, and is not necessarily the best form of dating.
The benefit of online dating is that allows people to connect with other single people outside of their usual dating pool. With over 40 million people using online dating, the possibilities to meet someone are endless (spira). Another great aspect of online dating is that it it gives one the ability to meet people outside of their geographic area, although that may seem like a disadvantage because some people may be too far, it is actually beneficial because it gives singles many more potential dates/relationships. Lastly, online dating is really a great dating tool because it gives a people matching tools that can connect them with people who have the same interests and are looking for the same thing. Also, when matches come up it can be set up so emails are sent to users that inform them of potential matches, making it easier to view and select prospective dates.
“The bottom-line truth about online dating is that, when you really think about, it isn’t all that different from “real world” dating. Either way, you meet somebody, hang out and hope for the best” (Conger).
In recent years, the use of online dating websites has risen dramatically. Since 2013 the amount of young adults using online dating sites or apps has nearly tripled (Smith Anderson). While online dating has become more common and more of a social “norm”, there are still many flaws to this method of dating. Online dating has worked for many and allowed for many people to have successful relationships, however, there are still negatives within the system.